Pokemon Go and get stuffed

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‘That’s the last time I take acid before using Google maps’

On my walk home from the train station the other day I passed through a nearby park, as I do every evening. It’s normally dark at the time I’m making this journey, and the park is so poorly lit that it’s practically pitch black, even just after 6pm.

Previously, I’ve seen a person urinating, I’ve seen a guy presumably passed out (but possibly dead) against a fence, and I’ve also seen teens making out on the play equipment. What these people have in common is the preference for darkness and the anonymity it creates, and I’m always fine to leave them to their activities, marching on and listening to music as I think about what’s for dinner, and why it’s not always tacos.

So you can imagine my surprise when I happened across what looked like the disembodied head of an Asian girl about 14 years old standing in the middle of the darkness. What the fuck was she doing other than being terrifying? Why was she unsupervised in an unlit park at night? Was she a ghost? Was she doing a Peter Dutton impersonation?

No. It turns out her face was lit up by her phone screen, as nearly all kids faces are these days, and she was wandering around, completely oblivious to me, looking for something. I let her be. Continue reading

Smoking Myself Out

Funny Animal Smoking_5

I told you there was a decent likelihood of me writing another post in the ‘Dave Quits Smoking’ saga – but you didn’t listen, did you? Of course you didn’t, it’s difficult if not impossible to ‘hear’ written text other than in an internal monologue. So really, YOU told you that there was a decent likelihood of it happening – but now things are getting really confusing.

Here are some more wonderful things I’ve noticed about quitting smoking in the last few weeks, as I edge slowly closer to the first smoke-less month of the rest of my life. Continue reading