Pokemon Go and get stuffed


‘That’s the last time I take acid before using Google maps’

On my walk home from the train station the other day I passed through a nearby park, as I do every evening. It’s normally dark at the time I’m making this journey, and the park is so poorly lit that it’s practically pitch black, even just after 6pm.

Previously, I’ve seen a person urinating, I’ve seen a guy presumably passed out (but possibly dead) against a fence, and I’ve also seen teens making out on the play equipment. What these people have in common is the preference for darkness and the anonymity it creates, and I’m always fine to leave them to their activities, marching on and listening to music as I think about what’s for dinner, and why it’s not always tacos.

So you can imagine my surprise when I happened across what looked like the disembodied head of an Asian girl about 14 years old standing in the middle of the darkness. What the fuck was she doing other than being terrifying? Why was she unsupervised in an unlit park at night? Was she a ghost? Was she doing a Peter Dutton impersonation?

No. It turns out her face was lit up by her phone screen, as nearly all kids faces are these days, and she was wandering around, completely oblivious to me, looking for something. I let her be. Continue reading


Out In The Amber


On Sunday I had the joy of going out and watching a gig for the first time in what felt like years. The music (supplied by Brazilian metal gods Sepultura) took me back to my aggressive teenage days – but there was something else that happened that took me back to practically every single gig I’ve been to. Perhaps you can relate.

This gave me an idea for another of my classic poems, which from conception to completion took all of 15 minutes. I wonder if any of the classic poets and literary greats had the intentional ease and dazzling skill that I do… hmmm. Anyway. Continue reading